Hello 2016!

Girls back to school with gusto and the decision that 2016 will be a New Years Resolution every day as soon as I am home from dropping them off.

Pressure.

By that I mean think carefully about ones day and how best to achieve something that benefits or is memorable to me.
I have never ever felt so unfit, unhealthy, unhappy, unstable mentally and physically and trying to tell myself that it's not as bad as all that and that these feelings will pass is becoming increasingly difficult as the months go by.
I ache.
I am so heavy.
It is beginning to affect my sleep, some nights my head spins with the worry of it all and I have to stand by the window and take deep breaths.

This is the last year I will feel like this.

So there you go, or there I go.

To start with the decorations went back into their boxes all wrapped in green paper I cannot tell you how happy that makes me.

I have even wrapped the decorations in themes, I don't know what this means for next year but it means something.

After this post I am going to write a November note to myself, with reminders of what I have put in place to make the holiday season easier.

Tonight I made the Waitrose Detox Cauliflower Pizza
I had everything in to make it except artichokes, half a portobello mushroom would have to do instead.

This is their version

This is what mine looked like. Ha!

There was very little care in photographing the dish, I was at clearing away stage and my hands were mucky, I did what I could.

Maybe if I added a filter (food stylist) too it would look appetizing.

I tried to make cauliflower cheese over Christmas, I have never made it before, making a white sauce for anything terrifies me so I put off making it but continued to buy the same vegetable over and over again thinking a fresher cauliflower will make the job easier??
WTF.
So with more of it accumulating in the fridge drawer, I made fashionable gluten free pizza instead.

It's not that bad and I am not hungry at all an hour on from dinner.
I don't know what left overs will taste like tomorrow lunch time.

I think the remaining heads will be turned into cauliflower rice. The Deputy Head has mentioned this new thing to me, I might go for it in the week.
If I am honest I was enthusiastic until she also said you add herbs and spices to the mix which basically means running away from the task and I will just end up buying more cauliflower to avoid cooking the dish.

New Years Reso 1- Honesty however ridiculous it makes me look.

It's going to be a long year.

CM